Last week we talked about harassment and one-sided fantasizing. We did not call it one-sided fantasizing, but that is what it was.
Our last topic in this series is going to be relationships that start at work. In this case, both parties are willing participants. I think modern communications systems have made these easier to do. Email, texting and so forth are far easier than putting "personal and confidential" notes in internal mail systems. Modern communications are also far easier to trace, too--email and texting leaves a trail that others can find (such as your spouse's lawyer).
Something happens and there is a spark between two people. Like the one-sided fantasizing, it is magical, and even better (ha!), both parties are participating. The sun comes up every morning, it never rains, we whistle while we work, life is great.
Don't fool yourself or selves. This can not and does not last. We can all put on a façade for a short period of time, but every human is eventually unmasked. Your underlying personality comes to the surface and sometimes its manifestation is very ugly.
Where this is more dangerous than the one-sided fantasy, which was plenty dangerous in and of itself, is this: someone else has the goods on you. If, in the happy days, for instance, you confided to your lover how you always manage to cheat on your expense reports by $50 or so and show them how to do it, you are toast. You have no idea when they are going to pull that little goody out of the hat and use it against you.
Or, let's say you two end up taking this to the altar. Over a lifetime, alimony and child support can easily reach $500,000 - $1,000,000 plus your jilted spouse's legal fees, which you will pay up front. Let me state this another way, this is 13 to 15 nicely equipped Corvettes. Don't laugh at the 45-year-olds who are driving a new Corvette--they have done the math.